Rapid streams

Tonight I'm home alone.
Husband's at work.
Son is with the grandparents.
I have the whole house to myself.
The whole need to myself.
The TV to myself.
I should be excited and happy right?
This is 'my break time'
'My me time ' 'alone time'
All I feel is anxiety.
I'm just feeling alone and anxious right now.
I haven't slept in a house alone in 3 years.
This is strange.
Feels wrong.
My stomach is in knots.
I can't shake it.
I'm lying in fetal position right now.
That's all that's comforting for me.
Stupid anxiety.